Esteem of self

Self worth and confidence for some people seem to be something that they are born with, for the rest of us (and there are many!), these are qualities we can learn and develop. 

Time and time again, whether it be my coaching clients or my yoga students, I see one consistent theme in how they develop confidence and self esteem: they do the work. That means that: if they aren't "feeling like it" they do it anyway; if challenges seem insurmountable, they take it one step at a time; if they don't know how, they learn. The key is in the attitude which I call the "yet" attitude. When someone says to me "but I don't know how," I finish their sentence by replying "yet." Whether it's "I'm not strong enough," "I can't," "I'll won't be able to," each of these can be finished by "yet." So what if you aren't who you expect yourself to be right now, no one is, but if you keep working through the tough stuff you will be. Anyone we admire was born with the same intelligence as the rest of us, they became worthy of our admiration by doing the work regardless of the obstacles along the way, and you can too.

The best part is that it's by doing the work which brings us self esteem and confidence. This is because each time we do it, we are proving to ourselves in a very real way that we can count on ourselves and that we can do it. Each time we prove to ourselves we can do it, we are saying yes to ourselves that we are worth it. That's powerful stuff, and it will transform your life.

Dictionary.com defines esteem in this way:

esteem   /ɪˈstim/ Show Spelled

–verb (used with object)

1. to regard highly or favorably; regard with respect or admiration: I esteem him for hishonesty.

2. to consider as of a certain value or of a certain type; regard: I esteem it worthless.

3. to set a value on; appraise.

 
–noun

4. favorable opinion or judgment; respect or regard: to hold a person in esteem.

 

All of these definitions include a favorable judgment worthy of high regard and respect, and respect is something that is earned. So as we slog through the hard stuff, we are proving to ourselves each time that we are strong, capable, and worthy of not only the respect of others, but our own.